yani

Hey long time I have not been online, just wanted to tell my team the cats and all my buddies thankyou for being so supportive.  I really appreciate you guys and learned to love you like my family, I might not be online that often but it doesn’t mean that I forgot about you all I carry you very close to my hearts.  As you know I am still in stage 1 from my surgery, I am doing good the soreness and pain is less as each day passes, the weight is dropping.  I will be seeing my Dr. tomarrow, and hopefully my blood levels are ok and I’ll be comming back home.  So please send a prayer my way so everything comes out ok.  If you have any  questions just email me I will try my best to update you guys atleast once a week.  I do maintain a daily contact with my friend Kama  “I love you by the way.” you are a very special women and I been blessed to have you as my friend. I continue with my education online not easy but possible I am in my finals in English and Computers class my next class is Algebra and it starts on the 12 of this week.

I love you kitties…….

how do i deal with my compulsive emotional eating

i journal the very moment i start feeling overwhelmed….i really don’t know what has

trigged this feeling yet so i need to get to the bottom of it…all i know that food in the

past has made me feel at ease and fills that void.

I write how i am feeling at that moment because it helps me identify why i am feeling

the way i am feeling

at the moment i am writing without stoping i just want to feel relief and only writing in

down helps me to clear my mind and ease the pain that is causing me to wanna stuff

myself.  all i know that i want what ever emotion that is causing this pain to stop.

after writing how i feel and why then helps me understand me, what trigged this

emotion and at the end helps me to realize that at that moment that i had control of

the situation….
And that is the begining of CHANGING OLD HABITS
i notice that no longer my emotions are going to be stonger than my desire to

CHANGE
so what i want to say that writing has become my best friend in dealing with my

emotions….feelings and void…..and that i finally can say i can control this feeling not

the feeling control me….because i am worth fighting  for……

my grandbaby hailey and meme today at 254

me at 289

i really been paying attention to my feelings….and so far i have not have one of those crazy moments when i just need to stuff my face to feel satisfied….for those who don’t know me their are days when my daughter’s leave and i am home alone for some reason to fill the void i start eating like a crazy even thou is healthy food but still the calories pack up….but since i started sp in conjunction with bs  i am able to really pay attention to the breakdown of calories,fat and protein. emotionally i feel great for once in my life i feel i can do this…break this bad habit….i am able to focus on me more …on how i can lose this weight now that i have this eating under control and i hope it stays like that….i need to then focus on moving and burning fat…….one thing i notice is that writing in my journal thru out the day help me fight this addiction….i got this down pack and tasting victory feel so good….i notice that last month i bought a pair of short 22-23 and they are lose i really am noticing the difference…i am working out hard….and when i start getting stress out i just go and run to my procardio machine instead of the fridge like i used to…..funny isn’t…..

i will finish this blog with this quote….

“There is power and courage inside each one of us, waiting for an excuse to escape.”

when i started back in dec 14, 2008 i was almost 290……and to see what i have gone thru it has been a rollercoaster ride…..but just to see 280’s gone, 270’s gone and now being in my 260’s…is a big accomplishment….

i want to thank my girls in wildcat team and my other friends and buddies who daily have been there supporting me thru my ups and down mood swings……it has been hard to let go of bad habits..and learn to eat healthy…..i mean i have tried before and managed to lose some weight these past 10 yrs but always fell back….one thruth is that when you don’t have that support system backing you up you fail…and when you fail is hard to get right back on track…..so now i have the will to change, the mindset and the tools but behind all that  one thing really missing in this puzzle to make it a whole….and are my friends in buddy slim….and because of all that….i….have manage to succed so far….now i will set a new mini goal at 230…..

once more love you girls….

When things go wrong…

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit
Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint on the clouds of doubt,
And you can never tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar.
So, stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit
It’s when things go wrong that you mustn’t quit.

my tummy and ribs hurt so much from this coughing….last night i could not sleep around 445 am i did and then my grandbaby woke up at 630 am …..since then i been up…..i can’t still do my workouts because my asthma start acting up…..i haven’t really had an appetite neither and i am just plain bored….

well just hope that i get better soon….tomarrow i going to see the cardiologist and get my test done to…..not really looking forward sitting at a waiting room….for hrs b4 the dr. can see me….

anyways i wanted to share with you my story….might add later on some pictures too…once i download the software in my daughters laptop so i can scan the pictures….bs/wildcats will be reading some blogs…..love you all

http://www.weight-loss-forums.buddyslim.com/weight-loss-challenge/3701-wildcats-stories-getting-know-you-17.html

Recognize Your Positive Qualities

Circle 10 (or more) of your strongest positive qualities, or write in your own at the bottom!
Post it in a prominent place where you live.
Begin each day by reading your list and affirming all of your positive attributes.

ABLE      EAGER      KIND      RATIONAL      ACCEPTING      EASY-GOING  

LEARNING      REALISTIC     ACCURATE      EFFICIENT      LEISURELY  

REASONABLE      ADAPTABLE       EMPATHIC      LIGHT-HEARTED  

REFLECTIVE      ADVENTUROUS      ENERGETIC      LIKABLE      RELAXED  

AFFECTIONATE      ENTERPRISING      LOGICAL      RELIABLE      ALERT  

ENTHUSIASTIC      LOVABLE      RESERVED      AMBITIOUS      FAIR-MINDED

LOVING      RESOURCEFUL      ARTISTIC      FAITHFUL     MATURE  

RESPONSIBLE      ASSERTIVE      FIT       MERRY      ROBUST      ATTRACTIVE  

FLEXIBLE      METHODICAL      SELF-CONTROLLED      BOLD      FORGIVING  

METICULOUS      SENSIBLE      BROAD-MINDED      FREE      MILD      SEXY  

CALM      FRIENDLY      MODERATE      SINCERE      CAPABLE      FULFILLED

MODEST      SOCIABLE      CANDID      FUNNY      NATURAL      SPECIAL

CAREFUL      GENEROUS      NEAT      SPONTANEOUS      CARING      GENTLE

NON-JUDGMENTAL      SPUNKY      CAUTIOUS      GLAD      NURTURING    

STABLE      CHARMING      GOOD-NATURED      OPEN-MINDED      STRONG    

CHEERFUL      GROWING      OPTIMISTIC      TACTFUL      CHILDLIKE

HAPPY      ORGANIZED      TALENTED      CLEAR-THINKING      HEALTHY

ORIGINAL      TENACIOUS       CLEVER      HELPFUL      OUTGOING  

THANKFUL      COMPASSIONATE      HONEST      PATIENT       THOROUGH

COMPETENT      HOPEFUL      PEACEFUL       TOLERANT      CONFIDENT    

HUMOROUS      PERSEVERING      TRUSTING      CONSCIENTIOUS

IDEALISTIC      PERSISTENT      TRUSTWORTHY      CONSIDERATE  

IMAGINATIVE      PLEASANT      UNDERSTANDING      COOPERATIVE  

INDEPENDENT      POLITE      UNINHIBITED      COURAGEOUS      

INDIVIDUALISTIC     POSITIVE      UNIQUE      CREATIVE      INDUSTRIOUS

PRACTICAL      VERSATILE      CURIOUS      INFORMAL      PRECISE      WARM

DEPENDABLE      INGENIOUS       PROGRESSIVE      WHOLE      DETERMINED

INTELLIGENT      PUNCTUAL      WITTY       DYNAMIC      INVENTIVE    

QUIET      ZANY

morning my peeps…..here wanted to give you an update midweek on how i am doing…..

emotionally i am feeling good…..i been keeping a good eye on my eating habits and emotions…..this is new for me still after all is hard to break this cycle of eating badly…..so i am taking one bad habit at a time……for now I been replacing sugar…..i notice that even those 100 cal can be very addicting as well….doesn’t mean i will never eat them again but instead of picking up one 100 cal goody avoiding them for at least this week……i been focusing on vegetebles this week more than fruits i tend to have more fruits and i need to get my body useto eating more veggies….

i have not eaten so far foods because i am sad or stressed i been eating because i am hungry….yesterday my daughters went out and brought home alcapurias is fried green plantains with meat inside i told my daughter i appreciate her thinking of me but i didn’t want it…..i need to do the same with all the time sometimes they snacking on cookies even it they are low fat version or sugar free ones still i need to focus on that one….

i am determine to make sure what ever i am going to eat why i am going to eat it….this is a big issue for me…..

well, about pmsing i notice this month i hardly didn’t even have cramps like last month i was not able to even exercise….

i still have the flu….been taking plenty of fluids water and tea…..

in my appearance i am doing pretty good taking care of me it feels so good……i like how it makes me feel…

and staying positive and avoiding negative thoughts or words that will push me over the edge….

well hope all you are doing good so far…..need to go will excersice then come back later to read some blogs and support my friends and buddies

as i been having lots of self talks lately I  figure out a few things that i been doing wrong…..

being to harsh on myself & negative self talk which has lead me to my own downfalls

so here i am picking up the pieces that are left…..of my broken down image and self repairing

it as each day goes by….i notice that if you don’t have a plan of action…before hand things go wrong….so i need to shift things around…one thing that is eating me alive is that i have let my self go…i am not paying attention to my appearance….just been bumming…not fixing myself, dressing up or even putting on makeup

so this week i am going to pay attention to my appereance because lately it sucks….so for starters I dye my hair auburn red…..will post pictures later on in the week….will dress up and do my hair and makeup each day even if i don’t go out………i will also focus on how that makes me feel emotionally….

also all that negative self talk needs to go that is a no no ….I need to give myself self affirmation….and leave all the negative thinking that is harming my sucess….

commitment + actions = results

so i am going to commit on reaching some goals this week and will at the end of the week give you a progress in how i reach or didn’t reach each goal….

one excersice at least 1 hr 6 days this week….including cardio, squats and dumbells training and if nice outside will walk outside….

will eat 3 meals, 3 snacks…stay within my cal intake limit and stay away from all foods that are not closely to natural foods, foods like….cookies, cakes, pizza or chinese food….any foods that are loaded with sugars and have lil or close to none fiber in them

make sure i drink plenty of H20 and the most important rest….will try to sleep early…so i will have enough energy to do each goal….

oh and i forgot to write i will  journal what i eat and how it made me feel….i mean everything…even water…….and the time i did……

i know is going to be hard…one thing i have against me is that aunt flow is planing to visit anyday now and today i woke up with the flu…

but i did my cardio and squats already…keeping my fingers crossed….and staying positive….will be around more often since i really haven’t…..

will keep you all posted….love and miss ya all….will be a better buddy as well….supporting eachother in your lives as well. we like a family we care for eachother…and that is why we support one another…